Goat Fondling: Day Two

Well today was day two. And just to give myself props I actually got up and immediately started preparations to milk Miss. Lucy. It was later than I wanted but that is the story of my life. Today, the goats had already been fed before I got out there so again we dealt with the fact that Lucy could have  cared less about the alluringly dangling feed bucket. The hubs sent the kids to find some cherry tomatoes or half grown cucumbers from our bumbling mini garden to woo her. I caught her quickly this morning and lifted her onto the stand with no issues. We rigged her up with no problems but she did back out of the strange guillotine type head harness once. She only tried to lay down once and was overall very well behaved. She likes the contact, maybe not the prodding, desperate attempts to get milk but the conversation and the hand feeding of edible people produce seems to be working. Lucy was a little skittish and if I got too rough she let me know. I tried to sit more behind her today and milk both teats simultaneously. I am not the Princess of Coordination so that was an interesting effort. I also found that my carpal tunnel was a hindrance. My hands went numb as I was milking. I am sure I am making it harder than it has to be. I would really love to go somewhere and watch in person someone else milking a goat so I could at least visualize a technique. Go figure I should have prepared better.
So this is still a learning experience for me. I am not focusing on quantity, just on building a routine and technique.  But, I still need to empty her enough so she produces more and also to relieve the pressure. I remember what nursing was like and I know that engorged breasts (or teats) are sheer agony. At some point tugging and squeezing on them is a kindness.
Today I filled my plastic tea pitcher about 1/4 or maybe even a 1/3 of the way up. While I was still going strong and milking away Lucy kicked it over. I ended up covered in goat hair and milk. I started again and got roughly a cup before I tapped out. I was of course reminding myself the whole time that I am not focusing on quantity.
No matter how rough I got I could not have been worse than Miss Snow White was when she finally was able to get to Mama Lucy. She actually head butted her still semi full udder repeatedly and watching her reminded me of my own kid, #2 eating. #2 was like that, an aggressive nurser. She acted like every meal was a challenge. It was not sweet bonding but rather her conquering the boob every feeding. Incidentally I only nursed her for ten months before I tapped out then too.
Anyway, aside from the spill the goat milking was successful today. If for no other reason than that it took place. I am looking forward to tomorrow as even calmer and more productive. I am also dreaming of the fresh butter I hope to make next week.
After harassing Lucy I got ready for the rest of my day. I had an interview that was completely non productive at the local Community College hoping to register for classes. Forgot some paperwork I was supposed to drop off in town and the hubs met me at an exit off the hwy to give it to me. Of course I then after the interview promptly decided to just deliver it tomorrow. Came home, cooked a fast dinner of steak fajitas and dressed for my Nursing Assistant Class this evening. While there (at a clinical site) a lovely, tiny little waif of a women with late stage Alzheimer's  leaned in very closely during a feeding and whispered pretty as you please to me "you bitch". I replied by offering her a bite of cole slaw and pureed hot dog. Another resident, a gentleman on the same hall asked me if I would "Come on over and just have a seat on it". Instead I offered him a snack. :) Came home early to the kids + 1 running amuck and completely filthy.
I cracked open the cheap wine, heated up a fajita, admired my two cups of fresh and untouched goats milk in the fridge and then did homework while directing the kids through baths and bedtime.
I want to call this a freakishly productive day although other than the cup of goats milk I don't seem to have any tangible accomplishments. It's all good though because my biggest drama today was in fact.....spilled milk. No sense in crying over that.

So I milked my first goat today...

I could go into all kinds of details about how I acquired dairy goats, how I house them, etc but instead Ill give you a brief window into me. Months ago I decided I wanted to try goats milk. So in Princess of Power fashion, because the idea of having my own goats milk fits with my grand picture perfect version of sustainable, harmonic living I got on Craigslist and quickly located two dairy goats, one just weaned doeling (girl), one bred junior doeling (that means knocked up teenager). I brought them home in my mini van with two chickens and the baby in the carseat. I put them in my chicken run because I didn't have an enclosure ready and figured I had a couple months to work it out. Fast forward to July, we have a functional goat pen and a brand new baby christened Snow White. My research told me I needed to wait two weeks to milk the Mama. Since the two weeks was up a week ago we quite naturally built our milking stand last night. After another quick internet search we remembered Mama Lucy and Snow White would have to be separated in order for us to milk Mama. So the hubs builds an impromptu crate sturdy enough to house generations of goats and at three AM  he hustled the little Princess in and shut the door meeting with only moderate concern from Mama. They could be separated 12 hours. We were both a little uncomfortable with that and had no intention of the first night leaving them apart that long. Since we are trying to develop an eventual schedule here and I am not an early riser we figure that on the average night we will put her in the crate at 10 or 11. This morning at ten I did a refresher Google search, pulled up a visual aid and grabbed my supplies; a plastic tea pitcher, two warm wet rags, and the Spray bottle of Betadine I keep in the barn for the horses.
Mama Lucy is still a bit timid because despite my best intentions of being the goat whisperer I never did spend hours in the coop wooing her with treats and my gentle intentions. She isn't aggressive but she also does not like to be caught. So the chase ensues. I send a kid to look for a leash, the hubs goes to find a rope, and finally while they are gone my nine year old daughter and I corner her and lead her to the milking stand. I pick her up and place her on there. They are actually quite a contraption and you secure their head between two boards. So we rig her up and we discover our first problem. The goats had already been fed. She wasn't interested in the feed bucket we forgot to attach but my daughter alluringly dangled in full reach. Not a huge issue, just unfortunate. We proceed on. I had read about what  to do if a goat acts bothered by you touching their teats. I expected her to kick. Nope, not Lucy, she decides the best course of action is to lay down. So now the kid is hand feeding her lettuce, the hubs is picking up her entire backside and I am attempting to get the milk. I have never milked anything besides myself in desperate engorged days of breastfeeding. The udder is huge, the teats are small. I refer to my visual aids and realize I have to squeeze the milk into the teat. Lucy, still not fond of my gentle but prodding touch, is still attempting to lay down. I can't manage both teats at the same time but I can do one at a time barely. The first stream that shot out missed my pitcher by a mile. But I was thrilled! I had done it. I was getting milk. I managed in twenty minutes to get about a cup of milk, accidentally spray the hubs twice, and purposely squirt one kid once. I call it a success and we release Lucy who is calmer and happier about the lettuce.
So six months, maybe $600 dollars later, it took three people forty five minutes to procure one cup of fresh goats milk. And I chalk it up as a win! Tomorrow we will get better and eventually this will be so mundane I make the nine year old do it.
And yes, I did try it immediately after I strained it. It was my first sip of goats milk. And it was...well it tasted like warm, weird milk. So begins a whole new adventure.

Sidetracked She-Ra? Me? The Princess of Power?

I totally just today found my spirit animal, my pop-culture role model, my own mini idol! For years it was a family joke that I possess the strength of She-Ra. I am in some ways freakishly strong, or perhaps just unwise. If it needs to be lifted or moved I will move it. I will find a way. I might wedge against a wall and push with my feet. I may or may not enlist help. The older I get I tend to lean on the hubs for most of the heavy lifting but in a pinch I will get it done. Anyway I have channeled She-Ra for years for heavy lifting. And in many ways my entire life has been spent leading a Great although sometimes poorly conceived  Rebellion. In short She-Ra rocked when I was six and she does now too!
So the sidetracked part? Well, lets face it I am sidetracked personified. I have incredibly varied interests, a chaotic life, and many roles I fill. I am interested in everything and I tend to dive in. DIVE in. Because I dive in I have some very...diverse...yeah, diverse, responsibilities. Because I am also the opposite of self disciplined I struggle to maintain and rarely meet the goals for most of my endeavors. That sounds all negative and sure in many ways it is. In many ways also however I have garnered experiences and skills that serve me well.
While I might not be self disciplined I am easily entertained, passionate, resourceful, and spontaneous. I see potential in EVERYTHING and EVERYONE, including myself.  I write because its how I process things. I crave consistency and hope to utilize blogging as a win win method of making small steps in my quest towards building one positive life habit! Just one. I figure that once I master one I  can attempt two and so on until I am actually able to be an adult! Really, this whole Princess of Power thing is completely perfect for me. One day I will be able to pull off Queen...the royal version not the 'I wish I could do my make up like that' version. In the meantime I think I will just try this.
So when I think about this blog and what it will be about I think of it as a charting of my sometimes mundane, sometimes hilarious, often misguided adventures in parenting, "hobby farming", holistic and sustainable living attempts. I don't know exactly how to narrow down the content because I am guessing this will just be a reflection of me...sidetracked She-Ra.